Once upon a time in a far away island, a young man named Matthew slept through the wee hours of the morning. As he dreamt of rashers and Hershey's chocolate, he was abruptly awoken to the voice of Dave Matthews. The man sprung out of bed and realized it was only the alarm on his phone. 'It's 10:30,' he said to himself, and he laid back down to sleep some more.
A half hour later, the man awoke again to the sound of buzzing. His phone was going off. He quickly became aware of his surroundings yet again, and opened the phone. It was a text from his friend Jess. She wanted to know if Matthew wanted to meet at 11:30 to go into the city and see the museum. On this day, Matthew had already decided he would do his laundry, since he had no underwear left. Matthew texted her back and told her not today. Besides, the museum was free on Sundays, so Matthew told her they would go then. So Matthew texted her back, closed his phone, closed his eyes, and went back to sleep.
At noon, Matthew woke up and decided he should start his day. He got up, made himself a ham sandwich and got on the computer to see what was going on in the world around him. His favorite hockey team, the Washington Capitals, are winners of 13 straight. 'Excellent!' exclaimed Matthew. 'They will surely win the Stanley Cup this year,' he said. Matthew also read an article entitled, 'Reggie Wayne injured.' Matthew immediately thought, 'Great!' A big football game called the Superbowl would be on tomorrow, and the Colts were playing the Saitns. Matthew did not want the Colts to win, because Peyton Manning was starting to annoy him. Plus, Matthew thinks the Colts are starting to act like elitist babies, and any team that starts showing a sense of entitlement deserves to lose. So Matthew decided to root for the Saints. No one is giving them a chance, and Matthew had a dream a few nights ago in which the Saints beat the Colts by a field goal. Maybe Matthew has ESP? He isn't convinced. But last year he did have a dream in October that the Steelers beat the Panthers in the Super Bowl, and half of that was true.
After Matthew checked the internet buzz he decided to go in search for washer tokens. As he made the long 1 minute journey down the path to the reception he realized it was Saturday. Reception isn't open on Saturday. This meant; no laundry. Matthew was furious. He's been wearing the same jeans interchangeably with another pair all week. Reception doesn't open until late tomorrow night! That's when the Super Bowl is on! Matthew cursed the University of Limerick, and their poor student services.
Matthew returned to his apartment, lonely, furious, and damp. It was another foggy day in Limerick, Ireland and the fog was starting to become a part of him. Almost as if he expected it every single day. Eventually, Matthew may just become on of the sea people from the Pirates of the Caribbean movies and grow barnacles and constantly be dripping with water. Then he could really be one with the damp weather that curses this town.
As Matthew sulked in his room, he got a friendly call from his pal Pierre. Pierre wanted to know if Matthew wanted to go buy the external hard drive box, so Pierre could try to back up Matt's files. Matthew said sure, got a shower, and ran over to Pierre's house. Pierre and Matthew then journeyed far into the mist to find a place called PC World, for all your PC needs. It was a far journey. So far that most usually use some mode of public transportation, or fast auto machines. However, Pierre and Matt trudged through the concrete and the fog to find said PC World. After 10 minutes of walking, they arrived. It was very familiar to Matthew. For this was the very same PC World that turned him away the first day he arrived on the island. Matthew was not convinced they would be of any help. Nevertheless, they continued. They came too far to back down now. As they waited to cross the concrete river in front of them, a very loud auto machine flashed by them. Pierre exclaimed, 'Ah, a Jackie!' Matthew had never heard this word before. He asked Pierre what it meant. Pierre told Matthew that in France, a jackie is an idiot who customizes their auto machine. In France, customization is not a big deal. In fact, they frown upon it. They hate loud auto machines with extra gizmos and gadgets. They believe the creator created the machine that way for a reason. Matthew told Pierre that where he was from, in America, they call them 'Douchebags.' Pierre was familiar with the term.
Once inside PC World, the two searched long and hard for the external drive. Pierre remained optimistic, as Matthew started to doubt the stores helpfulness. Finally, after what seemed to be years of searching, Pierre found the magic box! He paid for the box because he had to use it on his parents computer also, and the two set off to return home. As they trekked along, the boys started to question when they would eat again. Pierre insisted that the boys stop in a small village called Aldi. There the boys picked up cheddar cheese, ham, alcoholic cider and bread. Upon buying these items, the seller told Pierre that they only take cash. No credit cards allowed. Matthew only had a card on him as well. Pierre told Matthew to watch the stash, and set out in a quest for some cash. Fifteen minutes later, Pierre returned with some cash. He had to run and defeat and ATM at a petrol station in a village far down the road. Pierre paid the wretched woman, who was not into her job at all, and didn't crack a smile even once as Pierre told her about how sorry he was, and the two set off for home. The boys finally arrived back at Pierre's house, and Pierre started to test the computer hard drive. Within minutes, the magic box was finding viruses all over the hard drive. Pierre proclaimed that it would take many minutes to scan this device, and he decided to show Matthew a movie. The movie was made in 1997. It was a movie based off of an album by Daft Punk. Daft Punk is a techno group that made a CD and then paid an anime cartoonist to make a movie that followed the songs on the album. The resulting movie was amazing. It was a great story, and Matthew was very impressed. By the time the movie ended, the scan was still unfinished. Matthew decided to return to his house and go back at 7 for dinner. Matthew returned to his house, went on the computer and talked online.
At 7, Matthew and his friend Jeremie returned to Pierre's house. There they said hello to two of their good friend's, Tom from Ireland, and Kobe from Belgium. The boys all sat around and drank a magical liquid called Guinness. Some of them also drank magical liquids called Heineken and Beamish. Pierre then provided the guests with a feast. Sandwiches with ham and cheddar cheese in the middle, and cheddar cheese on top. Toasted. Matthew thought, 'These are French grilled ham and cheese sandwiches.' Matthew ate his meal and thought to himself, 'That was delicious. The extra cheese on the top really makes a difference!' The boys feasted and drank over highlights of a game called soccer. Matthew asked Tom if he had a favorite team, and Tom exclaimed, 'I'm an Arsenal fan.' Matthew again asked Tom if he followed soccer in Ireland. Tom told Matthew that there are 2 leagues in Ireland. A national league for good teams, and an A league for not so good teams. However, nobody in Ireland cares about Irish soccer. Tom told Matthew that if they are lucky, teams will only get 900 to 1,000 people at a game. 'It's boring,' said Tom. Everyone just roots for teams in the English Premiere League. If they don't root for teams in the EPL, they root for Celtic, in the Scottish Premiere League. Matthew was intrigued by this. Matthew was also intrigued by the game of Rugby, which was popular on this island. He asked Tom what the differences were between the teams and divisions. Tom told Matthew that Ireland has a national team. This team is made up of the best players in Ireland. This team will then play other national rugby teams within Europe, in a playoff style format, and there eventually is a European League winner. There is also an under 20 Irish national team does the same thing. After that, there is the Irish Rugby Football Union. This is where the hometown Munster Rugby squad lies. They play other teams from around Ireland and teams from Scotland and Wales as well.
After sharing a meal and knowledge of soccer and rugby, the men set out for a distant pub called the Stables. Before they went on their journey though, Matthew asked Tom, who is an RA, if he could get him into the reception for laundry tokens. Tom obliged and let Matthew purchase enough for two loads of laundry. Matthew was ecstatic, and told himself that he will do wash immediately tomorrow.
After walking many miles through thick fog, the boys made it to the pub. Here they drank more magical liquids, like Bavaria, and Corona. They also played Irish pool for the entire evening. One gentleman named Dave, who they did not know, killed all of them for many games. He was very drunk and told Matthew that he couldn't even take pride in beating them because he plays too much. He said he loves Irish pool, and he was kind of ashamed as to how much he plays every week. Dave did find it very interesting that Matthew was from America though. He asked Matthew where he was from, and after Matthew answered, 'Pennsylvania' Dave said, 'YES! East coast!' He then told Matthew, 'Yeah, I love the East coast more. It's awesome!' Matthew then asked him if he'd ever been to the land of America, and Dave said 'No.' This made Matthew wonder, 'Why are you choosing geographic sides in a country you've never been to?' Matthew was confused. Finally, Dave gave up his reign and left. Then Tom became the master of the table, and nobody could beat him. As they were playing, the men were graced with the presence of Ms. Kara, of Erie, for the evening. Kara sat on her throne and talked to the men throughout their games.
Once Kara left, the boys played a few more games and then decided to return to their homes. They walked back to their homes through the dense fog. They talked about Theo, and how he can't handle his beer. Jeremie even exclaimed, 'He is a two beer queer!' The boys shared a laugh and returned to their own homes.
Tomorrow, they would do the same thing again. Only on this day, laundry would be cleaned, ham and cheese would be hot wings, and soccer would be American Football.
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